Hi !
I am truly drawn by your post. While I don't know all that much about SEO, I can say I am a self-proclaimed witty writer and an alliteration aficionado. For my usual bread and butter, I head communications for executives, but am always happy to find side projects that challenge me.
Given that I'm a writer, it seems the other side of my brain is probably less performant, but luckily I have access to a wonderful tool called a calculator to address your first question.
1. 9,801
2. I am not sure what we mean about sales copy, but anything that draws me in is something that stands out, much like your post. So I'm hoping to reclaim myself with number three.
3. Walrus, I am the.
Egg man, are they, goo joo, goo
Singing Hare Krishna
(OK I just ripped off the Beatles).